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In What Key Shall A Man Take You? (Song Placement For Dummies)

9/27/2018

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Since last we met, I have gone through the play a few more times and made a list of possible places for songs. This list is definitely subject to change; I just wanted to get my first impulses down so I’d have something to work with. I don’t usually share things until they’re finished because I am a pathological control freak, so this will be an exciting life lesson for me!  

We’re three posts in, and I’m already encountering Issues. Right now my biggest problem is my desire to mess around with the format of the play. The point of this exercise is to learn how structure works, but I’m reimagining a five act play in a two act world. I don’t really want to write a five act musical. Do you want that, Gentle Readers? Let me know if you want that.

Another issue I’m facing is the antiquated sexual politics of a Shakespearean romantic comedy. I’m not sure how to resolve the fact that one of our leading men humiliates his fiancee at their wedding because he thinks she’s damaged goods - and then we’re supposed to cheer at the end when they marry after all? Personally, I think Hero deserves better.

The show is also looking really Act One heavy so far, which I might need to adjust. The thing is, most shows are Act One heavy because they need to give introductory songs to all the fucking characters. Much Ado has so many fucking characters. I am strongly considering combining Margaret and Ursula into one person to pare things down a little bit. Antonio is similarly not long for this world

Finally, the villain of the piece (one of the more interesting characters) just sort of...vanishes. I’m going to need to work out something for him to do in the second act, because to have your primary antagonist drift away is profoundly unsatisfying.

Without further ado (har), here’s the song list so far. This is gonna take forever, isn’t it?

Opening Number:
  • The point of this is to introduce the characters, so we’ll need a common theme, a refrain to bind them all together even though we gotta get through a ton of exposition. Most of the show's events depend on hearsay, so I may integrate gossiping into this song. Did you hear about Hugh Oatcake and Kim, etc. 
  • I think I want characters coming in and out and interacting in songs that interweave.
  • I’d also like to include the lower class characters a little more - there is a theme of class conflict running underneath the laughs that I’d like to highlight.
  • Obviously we will be including Sigh No More into this sequence.

Benedick and Beatrice Do Sexy Banter Part The First:
  • We gotta break things up a bit and introduce our main characters. Their dialogue here is so fun - I want to make sure it’s clear that they have this established “bit” that they do, they’ve been doing it for a while, and all their friends are like Will You Two Please Fuck Already.

A Big Song For Stupid Claudio:
  • Currently I’m running with the “Claudio is the real villain of the piece” concept, although that’s subject to change. I like the idea of giving him a “Maria” sort of song, but with an air of menace that foreshadows what an absolute dick he is later.
  • Hero doesn’t get much to say at the beginning, so I’ll keep to that theme and give her a Real Moment later.
  • One of the things that excites me most about writing for the theater is subverting the traditional musical theater tropes whenever possible. This will likely be a standard “I Want” song, except with a darker twist.  What he wants is a woman he’s never spoken to. That’s weird, isn’t it? I think it’s weird.

A Trio for Don Pedro, Benedick, and Claudio:
  • To introduce the “wooing in his stead” concept. Benedick keeps showing off how damn clever he is throughout this scene, so my initial thought is to have his interjections be in a different style of song than what the Prince and Claudio are doing. He is 100% That Guy. 

A Big Song For My Boyfriend Don John:
  • Honestly? I’m feeling a lot more sympathetic to our antagonist than I probably should. I promise to go over that in therapy, but for now he’s going to get a big old song about how he wants to bring these fancy motherfuckers down.

A Big Song For Beatrice:
  • She does a big section right before the party, and I think this is the perfect moment to let her take the stage. The other characters may have lines here and there, but this  is Beatrice’s time to shine. It’s the part when she says she’s not gonna cry hey ho for a husband, so I think I can have some fun with that. Plus we can bleed that song directly into...

THE PARTY SCENE:
  • Guys, part of me really wants to do a dance remix version of Sigh No More, talk me out of or into it please.
  • Hero needs to take her moment here - it’s the first time we really get any sense of who she is, and I want to bring that out as much as i can.
  • Beatrice and Benedick have a moment alone, and I want to find a way to show that there is real affection underneath all the wisecracks.
  • This sequence winds down with Claudio proposing and Hero accepting.

The Hatching The Plot Song!
  • Beatrice and Benedick’s Nosy Friends come up with the idea to trick them into admitting that they Should Just Fuck Already.
  • MISCHIEF! Don John and Borachiooooo do a darker coda at the end to introduce their own, much eviler scheme (think The Man’s echo of “Happy New Year” in RENT).

This part is hard because Hannah the writer really wants to throw the guards in here to give the principles a damn break, but that’s not how the play goes AND WE’RE SUPPOSED TO BE STUDYING STRUCTURE SO. Instead, we cut right to:

A Big Song For Benedick:
  • But like a short one. Because we have to get right on to...

The Great Sexual Tension Caper:
  • Now again, we’re supposed to be doing structure, but man I would really like to make the two "Overheard In Messina" scenes happen simultaneously. I may well just do that anyway. 

50 Shades Of Mistaken Identity:
  • In the original play we don’t see Margaret and Borachio doing their Hero and Claudio roleplay, we see Don John planting seeds of suspicion and then Borachio and Conrade discuss the incident in the next scene. I would love to stage this instead, and have a comedy duet for Margaret and Borachio with interjections from the three men. We’ll see how we go.

A Song For The Worst Security Guards In History:
  • Starring my Other Boyfriend Hugh Oatcake!
  • That’s all I have for this so far.
  • I really wish this scene happened earlier.

Act One Finale:
  • This sequence will open with the three female leads in trio, and then blur into the wedding. I’m currently considering the possibility of having the three male leads take over their melody into the wedding.
  • After Claudio Ruins Everything, we’ll reprise the “Hatching The Plot” song from earlier. I’m toying with the idea of eliminating the friar character and having Beatrice and Benedick come up with the idea to fake Hero’s death together. You know. To bond.
  • The big wedding scene goes immediately into one of my favorite scenes in the play ("Lady Beatrice, have you wept all this while?") which is incredibly important to the through-line of the main love story. It feels potentially anticlimactic to have an ensemble scene followed by a duet, but this does seem like a natural place to break for intermission. It might be effective to have this scene at the top of Act Two though - have you wept all this while? Yea, all through the fucking interval. 

Act Two Opener:
  • My desire to make major changes to this script continues apace. Technically the guards have another bit here, but I want Margaret to have a song. My thought is to integrate all of the servants and lower class characters into a sequence spreading the word about Hero’s Death-By-Heartbreak. This would work especially well l if I decide to open the second act with the previous scene - Benedick's last line is "Go comfort your cousin, I must say she is dead."  Either way, this sequence should transition nicely into...

A Big Song For Hero:
  • This is the one place where I’m definitely going to say fuck it and stray from the script. I need to let Hero have some feelings about her experiences. She gets no real opportunity in the original text to talk about how she feels about this whole situation, and I want to give her a voice. Sorry, purists.

The next sequence (Act V, Scene I) gets a little tricky for me. There's no clear place for a specific song, but a lot happens in a short amount of time. A solo moment for the grief-stricken Leonato could work. I also think it might be a good place for a reprise of the “trio” from the beginning of Act One, as the Prince and Claudio are pretty lighthearted at the beginning, and Benedick once again comes in with a completely different Mood. Then we need to integrate Dogberry being inexplicably good at his job, and the reveal of Hero's innocence. More on this story as it develops.

Benedick and Beatrice Do Sexy Banter Part The Second:
  • Benedick is definitely going to have a guitar, and Beatrice is definitely also going to be able to play said guitar. ​

A Small Song For Claudio:
  • Just a little one, where he sings about how sad he is that Hero is dead now that he knows she was still a virgin. Boo fuckin hoo, bro.

Maybe A Duet For Beatrice and Hero:
  • Again, I know this doesn’t happen in the play, but I would really like to give Hero a little more to say, and to have these two women interact without any dumb boys around to interrupt them.

The Finale Finale:
  • Wherein Hannah, a feminist writing in 2018, has to somehow marry her heroine off to a guy she (Hannah) hates without compromising Her Entire Store Of Integrity
  • At least Beatrice gets to say “I answer to that name, yes?” a thing I have always wanted to say in Real Life but every time anyone says my name I forget.
  • Again, we are clearly involving Sigh No More in this song somewhere.
  • Seriously where the hell did my villain go?  

This gives me anywhere from 20-25 songs to work with, and an awful lot of work to do. I suppose I’d better get started. ​
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Drunk Shakespeare

9/5/2018

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Here are some things I wrote down while re-reading Much Ado About Nothing for the first time in twenty years after three glasses of wine. Like what you see? You can support this project by throwing the money from that weird jar next to your bed at me via the link below: 
https://ko-fi.com/hannahvsthemany

  • Why is the Arden Shakespeare half introduction? That’s too much introduction.
  • Totally never knew there was a dude named Hugh Oatcake in this play.
  • I always think the play starts with the Hey Nonny Nonny song like in the movie but it doesn’t. That Hey Nonny Nonny song was like the Song Of The Summer 1599.
  • OH man it’s gonna be hard to set that song to something other than the melody from the movie, shit.
  • “For indeed I promised to eat all of his killing” YES MOM DESTROY HIM
  • HA I totally missed a joke in previous readings - Leonato says Hero has to be his kid cause that wife stealing slut Benedick was a kid when she was born. That’s a solid burn.
  • Beatrice is REALLY EAGER to start bantering with this guy. I get it. I too confuse arguing with foreplay.
  • Here’s the thing - I think there’s a lot of different ways to interpret B and B’s relationship, but to my eye they’ve been playing this game for a while. They’re not being tricked into falling in love, they’re being tricked into admitting it.
  • Claudio is so boring.
  • I know it’s different from a modern pov, but god i hate the “she’s pretty i love her now” trope, esp when compared to this well rehearsed vaudeville act the other couple have.
  • Why do people in plays always think it’s a good idea to wear a disguise and woo in one another’s stead wait hang on does that work?
  • “The sadness is without limit” Don John is so emo, i love him.
  • “It must not be denied i am a plain dealing villain” do i have a crush on Don John now, that’s new. And troubling.
  • B O R A C H I OOOOOOOO
  • Lots of eavesdropping in this play. Also lots of people pretending to be other people, don’t any of them have jobs? Who’s running this county?
  • Hero has some great moments with the prince in the dance scene. She’s clever, and not just the dutiful daughter. There’s a sweetness to her banter that’s a contrast to beatrice’s habitual shots to the jugular.
  • OH YEAH MARGARET’S HERE. we love margaret.
  • The party scene is def a song. All skate! Sigh No More should be used here, like it’s a pop hit. SONG OF THE SUMMER 1599.
  • OH MAN there’s some good stuff in the footnotes about Borachio and Margaret basically doing a role play of Claudio and Hero. Kinky Sex + Class Wars, a classic combo.
  • Do i have to include michael keaton? Those scenes always bored the hell out of me.
  • I can’t disavow my one true love hugh oatcake tho.
  • I think structure wise the act break needs to be after Claudio fucks up his own wedding.
  • “Shakespeare gives way too much power to friars” - My Mom
  • Beatrice’s big speech here is TOTALLY CORRECT CLAUDIO IS A LITTLE SHIT I HOPE SHE DOES EAT HIS HEART IN THE MARKETPLACE I WILL ALSO HAVE SOME
  • Conrade is pretty fussed about everyone knowing he’s a gentleman. Why does this sentence make me think of the “I Write Sins Not Tragedies” video?  (I paused here to watch the I Write Sins Not Tragedies video and why did they bleep out the word god but leave the terrifying mime guests?)
  • Yeah, michael keaton is getting one number max, and that is only because he’s a plot device, and because he’s friends with Hugh Oatcake.
  • Ooooooo i forgot the part where Benedick tries to write Beatrice a song, this is good shit. Maybe he plays guitar. Anyway, here’s Wonderwall. Anyway, here’s Sigh No More the SONG OF THE SUMMER 1599.
  • This scene is sweet. They’ve been too vulnerable with each other and now they’re having to find a way to speak that isn’t sparring. Plus she wants him to kill his friend, so that’s not ideal.
  • I'm having a really hard time getting behind the Hero/Claudio coupling in 2018. Is there a way to comment on that without making it too dark? My first instinct is to switch the reunions, have b and b go first. But the point of this is to study the structure, so we’re going to go with Shakespeare’s instinct here. Mine are usually terrible anyway.
  • So how to end this? I really hate when shows have big corny closing numbers, plus i need to reckon with one of the heroines being saddled to a total piece of shit who publicly shamed her at her own wedding for kinky sex she didn’t even get to have. Also Ursula is a person in this play who I have completely ignored up until this point.  
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